The Lovers

The Meaning


Choices around relationships. The arrival of a new person into your life. Dilemmas.


Going Deeper

The Lovers is one of those cards that generally doesn't show the difficulties it brings. It is easy to assume that when it appears in a reading, you'll see prince charming on his trusty steed, but after fifteen years of seeing this card appear I can say that it rarely means a life long love. The true meaning of The Lovers is more about having to make a choice. The choice presented usually involves having to decide whether to go with something that is safe or if you should go with desire. There will frequently be third party interference if the Lovers shows up yet the third party can be drink, drugs, work, ideals, family members ~ it doesn't have to be symbolic of an affair. There is no alternative but to dig deep and work out what it is that will make you really happy. In contrast to the card before, The Lovers indicates trust is lacking because someone is deceitful. There can be good reason to be suspicious if The Lovers appears; but like I already said, it doesn't have to be about affairs. The inner dilemmas that can rage whilst this card is in operation can be uncomfortable because somewhere inside is the knowledge that all is not well. If we are living the kind of life where we are supposed to be happy and getting on with it, I think in some ways getting this card is harder because of the heavy expectations we are carrying. There is an age in life where we're not supposed to have these inner conflicts (whatever the age currently deemed acceptable by society), to have them in your twenties is to be almost expected but if you've passed this stage, then it usually indicates a potential disruption in the marriage and home situation. Maybe there's something you really want to do, but your family thinks your energy is all for them? Whatever the choice presented there will be no easy way to resolve the dilemma. In an ideal world you'll do whatever is needed to keep your soul growing but as a realist, I know it's not that easy to make decisions that directly/indirectly affect others. None of us want to be seen as the bastard but unfortunately we can't please all of the people all of the time. 


Astro Insight

The sign of Gemini. 


Examples With Other Cards

Swords: With the three, a seriously painful triangle and choices that could mean heartbreak. The ten is having no choice but to choose (usually to let go). The nine indicates far too much isolation and a need to reach out for help. The two and six show a need to confront the situation rather than going into denial. Cups: With the seven, things are not what they seem, and it would be wise to wait before committing. Wands: A need to give voice to your conscience, something isn't sitting right. Magician: A need to make sure it's not just gossip. Hierophant: Needing to choose from the heart. Tower: Sudden revelations about your significant other. Moon: Needing to have clarity and facts before moving forward. 


To Help Yourself or Give Advice To Clients

It's all too easy to get excited by this card, but the reality is usually disappointing when viewed in six months time. Caution in decision making is advised but only because there's the likelihood that situations are being looked at superficially. 


Common Associations



The air element. The colour yellow. Synchronicity and the ability to read signs and omens from the cosmos. Rutilated quartz and citrine are the gemstones that resonate with this card.